~ Fortitude ; Strength of mind that allows one to endure pain or adversity with courage. ~

I wrote this poem after my beautiful sister Jessica & her
two sons were killed by a reckless drunk driver, November 12th 2010
Her daughter was the only survivor


My heart hit with a very hard blow, I didn't see it coming, how was I supposed to know?
Very painful indeed the shock sent me to my knees.

I cry out loud, my tears continue to pour out.
My soul it groans under this heavy burden and load.

Like waking up from a bad dream, I still ask myself is this really happening?
How do I continue to live and carry on when all I feel is heartache and pain?

Every morning when I wake, the reality of not being able to see their face,
feels like I'm losing them all over again.

He didn't just take one but he killed three, each very special and dear to me.
All in one night taken so suddenly, killed so horrific and violently.

I cant hardly imagine what the crash was like. I hope their deaths came suddenly.
It haunts me to my soul this question the answer I may never know,
did they feel any pain from the mustangs blow?

Their little bodies were torn, broken, crushed and bruised.
So badly that at the funeral in their coffins I couldn't look, I had to refuse.

My beautiful nephew's, my sister my best friend, I love you, you mean so much to me.
You filled my life with so many blessings.

Jessica, you gave me love unconditionally.
When I needed you, you never once failed me.

Because of you I can honesty say, all you poured out and gave,
helped make me into the women I am today!

Losing you it hurts it stings. If I could hold you, I would never
let you go.

Where you once were part of my life, now is a empty space that
no-one on this earth could fill, I will miss you and I always will.

I don't think this pain is ever going to heal.

I will try and find the purpose in all of this and use it for good so my sisters legacy will live.

Give compassion and offer grace to the one who broke my heart and took away what could never be

I am sure Manley Williams and his families life's too are now re-arranged.
I hope and I pray he and others are hurt enough so to learn a lesson from the careless choice, he decided to take.

As a promise to them, I will forgive and let hate go.

Be strong for the ones left behind and give my niece a safe place to go.

Carry on and move forward in life, even when its hard and without them in it, it will never be the same.

My God is bigger then me. I shall give it to Him to carry for me.

He is were I find comfort and peace and it fills me with joy to know
they are with Him now as I write as I speak.

When I close my eyes I can still see those beautiful smiles and eyes
full of love looking back at me.

It warms my soul knowing I had them and now they live on as a part of me.

They were special and precious gifts from Heaven.

Thank you Lord for graciously sharing them with me,
though to short it seems and I would do anything to have them back with me.

They have gone on before me but the bond we share still remains,
it is stronger then death and will out-live all eternity.

Gold and silver could not compare to the value of their memories,
true treasure they are I carry in my heart.

I look forward to that day...
In Heaven when again we'll meet and never again have to depart.

This fact like the air I breath and death can not steal this truth, for it is a promise from God you see.


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